Beverage of Choice?

SO, we've got the Tea Party. There's not much here that isn't ridiculous. Yes, what is possibly the first group of people in history who don't know how to soothe their anger with a baggie of dried herbs can be likened to the political equivalent of a platypus: a contradictory hodgepodge of all the things that make us laugh at the other animals, they have no problem being pro-free market/anti-AIG bonuses, pro-small government/anti-choice... and they have venomous hooks on their hind legs for dominance fights.

While Sarah Palin is ridiculous, her selection as spokesthing of the movement is anything but: who better to channel the anger of a democratic government's uninformed, ahistorically-minded, blathering bunch of slogan-toting bandwagoners than a youngish, ill-informed, wealthy demagogue who voluntarily relinquished the power constitutionally given her by an oft-ignored state to turn her fifteen minutes into $15 million?
In fact, speaking as an Alaskan, I'd like to point out that we already have a state for people who don't like the lower 48, with a temperature and temperament that's down for whatever you are. Grow a beard. Grab a beer.  Look out for bears.


RIDICULESSON #4: When your entire joint contribution to the American people is to make Google's SafeSearch engineers earn their pay, it may be time to get out of politics.


In the other corner, we've got the nascent Coffee Party, a coalition of caffeine addicts who've taken a solemn vow to protect America from this guy. They've decided that meeting in angsty echo chambers across the country will foment a movement of a non-bowelly nature. Here's hoping that their smooth-yet-reinvigorating blend of promise, liberals, and stimulants leads to something besides a biscotti shortage.

Boba Fett's Alma Mater?

FIRST, the advertisers at facebook used their sophisticated web crawling technowizardry to discern that I was both 1) male, and 2) in Korea. From this, it was extrapolated that I Needed a Filipina Beauty Today.

Now that I'm back in the good ol' US of A, facebook has struck an equally amazing find with their newest suggestion:

http://www.degrees.info/online/criminal-justice/bounty-hunter.html

RIDICULESSON #3: Facebook ads are like facebook friends -- after scanning your wall and info for 5 seconds, neither actually knows anything about you.

My favorite part:

BOUNTY HUNTER DEGREES:

There are no formal degrees either required or offered for this profession.

That either makes me sorely disappointed or greatly relieved, but I'm not sure which.

Korea Kontinued

MOVING from edible to incredible, we analyze the nature of cross-cultural nomenclature.

RIDICULESSON #2: Connotations have no place in foreign signage. Diarrhea was selected as one of the most beautiful words in English by non-speakers.






A cleverly placed closure can't compensate for your poor judgment, Cleavage Bar. Too little, too late.

Irony, thy name is Frat Dude.

















This could only be made better by this.

Maiden Voyage: Korean Commodities

IF there was one singular purpose for the development of the internet -- nay, for communication itself, it was the desire of one human to show another human something ridiculous.

In that spirit, let the the culmination of that journey now begin.

Ridiculesson #1: Koreans will buy pretty much anything, provided it contains equal parts of at least 2 of the following: English, ridiculosity, and pseudohealthiness.


Water, water, every where,
Nor any drop to drink...









Wait.













YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG.